Devon Oratz, Broken-Hearted Loser

Devon Oratz  is a 32 year old writer and game designer who has utterly and perhaps irredeemably ruined his own life. I received his BA in Creative Writing in 2008 from the Charles & Lily Lieb Port Creative Writing program at SUNY Purchase. My short story “Revelations” appears in the Spring ’08 issue of Space and Time Magazine, as mentioned here. Before college, I had a strong interest in game design as a hobby, and by midway through college, I had strongly resolved to pursue it as a career, thanks to my science fiction LARP Systems Malfunction–many of the best years of my life were spent playing that game. Now, with the collapse of End Transmission Games, I have returned my focus primarily to fiction

“It’s only you beautiful
Or I don’t want anyone
If I can choose
It’s only you.”
– Brand New, “The No Seatbelt Song”

A brief and important personal confession/disclosure: In college, I met the girl of my dreams, Mikaela Barree. She was my muse and partner in the last four scholastic semesters of the LARP Systems Malfunction and instrumental in the seven years the game went on after that. She was instrumental in the founding, funding, and creative energy that went into End Transmission Games. The eleven years we were together were largely the best years of my life. She gave me everything I could possibly have wanted and until a rude awakening in late 2017, I was beyond excited for her to be my wife.

However, I took her for granted for years: I was greedy, cocky, and generally an asshole. As I result I have lost her, very possibly forever. This is both the worst thing I can think of and a real possibility. I am not suicidal or even celibate, but the only person I would ever want to share the rest of my life with–my one and only–may be irredeemably lost to me, and I have only myself to blame. Hence, I expect there’s a fair chance I’ll spend all the rest of my days as a broken hearted loser who squandered his one chance at love, and trust, and hope, with someone who was undeniably worth it. So basically, this is a monument to a relationship I was in and how badly I fucked it up. That’s all.

When not making RPGs of all sorts as a total and irredeemable geek, I’m probably playing one of the above. When I’m not doing that, being an enormous film buff, I’m on the hunt for the elusive movie that I’ve has not already seen, but might potentially enjoy, or trying to show great movies to people I know that will love them.

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